Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Waiting for the Phone

When you are an Army Wife to a Deployed soldier lots of things about your life change.  For me, one of the most prominent is my relationship to my phone.  Since my husband left some odd months ago, My hand appears to have acquired an interesting growth in the shape of a BlackBerry smart phone.

Receiving word from him has become a life line, especially this being the first year of our marriage.  The red light blinks, I rush to see what it is.  A text, email or BBM.  The tell tail chime of the Black Berry Messenger sounds off and my hand is already scrolling to see what news/message he is sending.  Even my Boss has become incredibly tolerant to my random texting during otherwise inappropriate moments in the work place, because she knows it might be the only time I hear from him that day.  Earlier today, I missed BBMing him by 27 minutes because I put the phone down to get my daughter to bed and didn't hear the chime over the din of the house.  I was upset I missed the chance to BBM him, but alas, moms really don't have as many hands as we're famed to have.

My husband loves his phone.  He used it all the time.  To call me, text me, send me a picture.   It got to the point during our courtship, I had to set limits on when and how long it was productive to be on the phone.  I felt immensely guilty for not wanting to talk during my entire commute to work, because I needed some alone time.  Now, looking back, I'd give anything to hear 'too much' from him.   I knew I'd feel that way in the coming months, but at the time, I could not help it.

This is not particularly how I envisioned the first year of marriage to the love of my life.  Shortly after we wed, I helped him pack up... not for a honeymoon, but for war.  I shop at the store for him, but not for daily things. Things he can use in the Sandbox, snacks that won't perish during the time spent in the care packages I send. I keep him a part of my every day life as much as possible.  We won't start our life 'together' until he returns home.  I only pray he returns much the same as he left.

7 comments:

  1. Having done this for the third time now I completely understand the whole phone situation. I missed my husbands call today and was kinda upset because it wasn't to long ago that I hadn't heard from him in over a week. I have to say that is the worst part. But, I also love Skype, Skype has become my favorite thing of all. Being able to actually see my husband is an amazing feeling. I can see his body language so it settles my mind to physically "see" that he is doing okay. Your relationship and marriage will be very different than others because when he comes home it will be stronger than most that have been married for a year. Your strengths will change as well. You will realize things you can do that you didn't think you could and how much stress you can handle and how not to let the little thing get to you. Not sure if this makes sense but it soon will, at least for me it did :-) We will get threw this. We are Army Wives, we have a strength that is indescribable and no other person other than an Army Spouse can understand :-)

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  2. Unfortunately, we have not had the opportunity to Skype. I hope that we will, I'd love to -see- him!

    We are Army Wives!! HOOAH!

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  3. "Shortly after we wed, I helped him pack up... not for a honeymoon, but for war. "

    me too.... bless your heart hon =)

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  4. Thank you, SolidersAngel, and bless you too!! Very few people understand what goes through your brain in a situation like that.

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  5. I have a pretty similar story so I understand what you're going through. My husband and I were together for 4 months before we got married during his rnr. So the majority of our time together has been during his deployment. Skype is definitely a lifesaver! Army wives really do have a strength that no one else can understand.

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  6. Erika, we really do. HOOAH, my friend!!!

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  7. I am not an Army Wife, but I am the girlfriend of a Marine and I can relate to some of these same issues. The part about being glued to your phone, and the incredible guilt you feel if you miss a call. The part about waiting to start life together until they get back. Etc...the list goes on. Thanks for sharing!

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