Just trying to get through this pregnancy

Some days it's harder than others to get through this pregnancy and know that at the end of the day, there is no one there to rub my swelling feet, or make dinner for myself or the kids, or rub my shoulders when they are tense, or to get me some tums when I am nauseous first thing in the morning.

The phrase "This too shall pass" comes to mind a lot and I remind myself that it could be a lot worse.  My husband is coming home, for example, and my baby will have a dad.  There are some who do not have these simple blessings in life so when I start down that road, I try to remember there is always someone worse off than you.

It doesn't mean that I have to like it, or that I don't still miss my husband and sharing the process of this journey with him.  I take pictures of the ultrasounds and send them to him.  He asks how I am feeling on a regular basis.  It's all these little things that help us stay connected during this pregnancy.  I had told him I didn't want to go through a pregnancy without him, but here I am.  And I would not change it, because what a gift I have growing away inside me.

So it's one day at a time.  The time is starting to fly.  Some days seem like they last forever, and others are over and done with before I've woken up.  Keeping busy is key and surrounding yourself with friends who care to check in on you and help you out in life, are priceless.  It looks like he will be home for part of the pregnancy and I am really looking forward to sharing those moments with him.  Not having him around for these months will make those ones all that much more special and meaningful.

Here's a neat thing that a friend of mine shared yesterday, I thought  I would pass it along:

If you  have kids, check this out!!  I signed my kids up yesterday, it was great.  Nice to know I have a back up to do something with the kids on the summer days that are not all that great.  Bowling can be expensive!  Be sure to take advantage of this offer.

About	950+ bowling centers in 46 states & Canada are participating in the 3rd Annual Kids Bowl Free program

Mission	The "Kids Bowl Free" is a summer bowling program that is sponsored by select bowling centers across the country.
Products	Kids receive 2 free games of bowling everyday during the summer. There is no cost to participate.

Website	http://www.KidsBowlFree.com

R&R and New Editions

A while ago, my husband came home for his R&R and we all had a great time.  Perhaps he and I had a wee bit too much of a good time as about three weeks later, I started to not feel so hot.  So I took a pregnancy test, and .... it was negative.  So I went about my business adjusting to life without my husband again.

Still, I had a feeling I could not shake, so I tested again.  I didn't see anything right away, so I washed up and went to toss it.  I gave it a quick second look... and coulda have sworn I saw a faint pink line.  Perhaps it was wishful thinking, I was not certain.  So I took a picture and sent it off to a couple friends.  Shortly after I got two confirmations from friends... yup, they saw a faint pink line too.  I sent it to my husband who replied that he could not really tell.

On my way to work that day I stopped and got a few more tests, including a digital one, which also read in bold letters, PREGNANT.  That one, my husband reported, was quite clear.  So I squealed with a couple of my friends and then hung in tight there for a while.  I have a history of loss and one pregnancy that resulted in a tumor.

A couple early ultrasounds and a series of blood tests and everything seems to be going to plan.  After a little while, though it was hard to keep it from everyone, so I ended up telling my co-workers and my parents, as it was not fair to all of them if something went wrong.

Approaching ten weeks, another appointment and a happy, squirming embryo was seen... I felt it was safe to tell the kids.  I made copies about a ten week pregnancy from babycenter, and folded them up and put them in large plastic eggs, which I included in the kids Easter goodies.  They all went for the big egg first.  Silence as they unfolded the paper, then as they read it.  Finally, my daughter was the first one to understand what was being prevented and she cried out, "Mommy is having a baby!!!"  Then she cried and came over and gave me a big hug.  Sweet.

They had some questions which I answered and we talked about wanting a boy or a girl.  For now, I am trying to share my pregnancy with my husband who is thousands of miles away.  Recently, I was having a bad day and my husband happened to call.  I sobbed on the phone with him, the poor guy.  He made the comment , "Wow honey you are  really hormonal now aren't you?"  Good thing he was so far away, cause that's not the nicest thing to say to a pregnancy lady.  :)  I felt bad, I have not cried that like when talking to him the entire deployment.  But I've been told that when it's your first year of marriage, you're pregnant and your husband is deployed you are entitled to a few good cries.

I have an upcoming US and I plan on buying a little cam corder to record it so I can send it to my husband so that he can watch as well.  I'm doing my best to try to include him as much as possible.